Author Archives: anika@gritpilekidz.com

In youth sports, everyone talks about skill, speed, and strength—but the real game-changer? Is the kids mindset. The difference between winning and losing often comes down to what’s happening inside an athlete’s head before they even step onto the ice, field, or court. We parents book endless skill sessions even before school and as young as elementary school age, leading youth hockey programs are base skill development and even coaching lessons are mainly on skill-based. Yet, while technical ability is crucial, without the right mental preparation, an athlete’s full potential can never be unlocked.

Have you ever watched the swimmers at the Olympic Games stepping up to their lanes before the race—headphones on, dark goggles covering their eyes, long warm jackets wrapped around them—completely locked into their own world? They’re not just preparing their bodies; they’re preparing their minds. This ability to tune out distractions and focus completely is a skill that separates great athletes from the rest. The same goes for hockey players lacing up their skates before the puck drops, gymnasts before a routine, or a basketball player stepping up for a free throw with the game on the line. If your mind isn’t locked in, your performance won’t be either.

The Keys to a Winning Mindset

So how do we teach kids to get into this focused, confident state? Like anything, it’s a skill that can be developed with practice.

1. Develop a Pre-Game Routine – Just like athletes stretch and warm up their bodies, they need to warm up their minds. Deep breathing, visualization, or listening to music (not scrolling on social media, listening to music) helps them lock in and focus.
2. Turn to Focus Over Fear – Teaching kids to tune out distractions and self-doubt is key. Negative thoughts and felt pressure creep in, but athletes who train their minds learn to replace them and turn them into motivation and resilience, for example with positive affirmations: “I am ready,” “I am strong,” “I’ve got this.”
3. Strive to be Calm, Confident, Centered – Pressure can either break you or fuel you. The best athletes learn to stay cool under pressure. They use the adrenalin to fire up their willpower. They trust their training, control their breathing, and step into competition with a calm, focused energy.

Training for Sports… while Learning Skills for Life

The best part? This mental toughness doesn’t just help in sports—it carries over to every high-pressure situation in life. Learning to focus before a hockey game or sorts competitions is the same skill kids will use before a big exam, a job interview, or any moment when the pressure is on. The earlier kids learn these skills the better they will serve them over the course of their lives.

By building these habits young, we’re not just creating better athletes—we’re creating confident, resilient kids who can handle whatever life throws their way.

At Grit Pile Kidz, we believe in training the mind as much as the body. Let’s help the next generation learn how to compete—not just with skill, but with the right mindset to win. 

GPK – Anika Charron

As parents, coaches, and mentors, we all want the best for our young athletes. We dedicate time, energy, and resources to help them succeed. But in our pursuit of excellence, are we unintentionally making the journey more difficult for them?

Children don’t just need opportunities—they need the right kind of support. If we want them to develop resilience, independence, and true passion for their sport, we have to step back and allow them to take ownership of their journey. Here’s how we can better support them along the way.

1. Play Freely

Have you ever noticed a young player glancing at the sidelines after every mistake? Hesitating before making a play? Playing tight instead of having fun? That’s because they feel like they’re constantly being evaluated—by coaches, parents, and peers.

If every game feels like Judgment Day, the joy of playing disappears. Our kids need space to love the game again. They don’t need constant feedback. They need the freedom to play, make mistakes, and learn without the weight of expectations crushing them.

Encourage them. Cheer them on. But let them play for themselves, not for validation.

2. Own Their Journey

We say we want our kids to love the game, but do we actually let them own it?

• Who decided what sport they play?
• Who decided which team they tried out for?
• Who decided how often they train?
• Who decided what success looks like?

Nothing kills passion faster than feeling like you have no control over your own journey. Let them drive the boat. Encourage them to choose their sport, their level of commitment, and their personal goals. Whether they play for fun, competition, or dreams of the big leagues, it should be their choice.

Part of owning their journey means that the sport should feel like their own, not something micromanaged by parents. Watching every practice, commenting on every move, and constantly critiquing them does not give kids the independence to develop their passion. It doesn’t allow them the space to mature in a way that prepares them to handle life.

When they learn to navigate challenges on their own, they build the resilience and self-confidence needed for the real world.

3. Struggles Build Strength

It’s natural to want to help when we see our child struggling. We step in. We correct. We sign them up for extra lessons. But what message does that send?

“You’re not good enough to figure this out on your own.”

If we always rescue them, they’ll never learn they can rescue themselves. Struggle isn’t something to be avoided—it’s a critical part of growth. When they work through challenges on their own, they build resilience, problem-solving skills, and confidence that will carry them far beyond sports.

Not getting equal playtime? Instead of stepping in to advocate for them, teach them how to advocate for themselves. Coaches are the professionals who make the calls. If they want more playing time, they need to take responsibility and ask their coach what they need to improve to move up in the lineup. Learning how to self-advocate—asking questions, taking feedback, and applying it—is one of the most valuable skills they can develop.

This is how they grow. This is how they learn to handle challenges, not just in sports but in life.

4. Focus on the Present

“You need to work on this if you want to make varsity.”
“If you’re serious about playing D1, you have to put in extra hours.”
“You’ll never make the National Development Program  if you don’t step it up.”

These statements may come from a place of encouragement, but they can also take the joy out of the present moment. When we constantly focus on what’s next, we pull them away from what’s now.

The best way to build future success is to stay in the present. When kids are engaged, excited, and improving today, they naturally put themselves in a position for opportunities down the road.

5. Fun in the Game

They used to run out the door for practice. Now, they have to be dragged.

At some point, the game stopped feeling like play and started feeling like work. That shift can drain passion faster than anything else.

Kids need rest. They need balance. They need time to miss the game. Rest isn’t quitting—it’s refueling. If we want them to stick with sports for the long run, we have to ensure that it stays fun.

6. Safe Space

Perhaps the most important role we play in our child’s sports experience is being their safe space.

Win or lose, they need to know that their value doesn’t change based on their performance. They should never feel like they are loved more when they win and less when they lose. But too many kids do.

Be the one person they can count on. The one who makes them feel supported, no matter the outcome. Because at the end of the day, their development—both as an athlete and as a person—is what truly matters.

Fruit for Thought

Sports can be an incredible tool to build grit, confidence, and resilience. But for that to happen, kids need ownership of their experience.

Encourage them to love the game, not just play it. Let them struggle, let them choose, let them own their journey.

Most importantly, when challenges arise, let them be the ones to figure out how to improve and advocate for themselves. Learning to ask coaches for guidance and putting in the effort to improve are life lessons that go beyond sports.

They don’t need us to micromanage. They need us to support them.

And guess what? Maybe our kids’ passions and interests won’t always line up with our favorite team. Maybe we need to let go of making their sport our social time. Maybe we need to stop treating youth sports like our private country club and remember that the goal isn’t to fit in with a group of parents—it’s to raise strong, independent kids who can navigate life on their own terms. Ask yourself this: “Would you rather have your kids grow up to be independent and successful in life and you rarely see them, or would you want to see them every day but they will always fully depend on you?”

When we step back and let them take the lead, we don’t just build better athletes—we build stronger, more resilient kids who are ready to take on whatever life throws their way.

Anika Charron – GPK

Why Passion Matters

In many parts of North America, the landscape of youth activities has shifted. Unstructured, unsolicited play—once a cornerstone of childhood—has often been replaced by structured practice aimed at accelerating skill development. While this approach may yield immediate results, it risks undermining a child’s long-term relationship with their chosen activity. True growth stems from a love of play, discovery, and genuine fun.

As parents, let’s embrace a new perspective: one that celebrates the journey rather than just the outcome. Let’s prioritize the size of their “Grit Pile” over their “Achievement Pile,” focusing on growth, resilience, and joy.

Passion is the heartbeat of grit—the engine that drives perseverance. Yet, in today’s ultra-competitive world, filled with youth sports leagues, academic pressures, and social media expectations, it’s easy to lose sight of this essential truth. Activities should serve as platforms for children to explore, learn, and develop life skills—not merely stepping stones to meet external benchmarks. When goals are imposed by others, kids lose agency, along with the invaluable lessons that come from experiencing failure.

Failure is not the enemy; it’s a vital part of learning. It builds resilience, shapes character, and fosters independence. But when we rush to shield children from failure through endless lessons and structured routines, we risk extinguishing their passion and, with it, their ability to thrive.

The Passion Score: A Simple Measure

Here’s a thought-provoking tool:

Passion Score = (Unsolicited, Unstructured Hours per Week) ÷ (Structured Hours per Week)

If this score falls below 100%, it may indicate a need for more unstructured time to allow the child’s natural interests and love for their activity to flourish. Passion, not obligation, should be the foundation of their journey.

Stories of Grit and Growth

The Grit Pile Kidz Blog brings you real-life stories from professional athletes and everyday heroes who embody grit, passion, and perseverance. These accounts highlight the value of commitment, the power of resilience, and the “find a way” mentality that fuels success—not just in sports, but in life.

Follow along with the GPK team as we explore what it means to grow, thrive, and help the next generation build their own Grit Piles. Together, let’s inspire kids to not only achieve but to love the journey that gets them there.

The GPK Team